Ya darn tootin'

Modern Marvels

I'm always impressed how they get so much toothpaste into that last inch. One of science's great achievements!

At first I was feeling charitable and decided to give this guy a pass for showing such bad form and showing up in Beijing wearing the official "your country is foul and toxic" symbol on his face. We all know how we Americans love our fear!

But then this one comes along and it's time to blog.





This lady from the American team that is not going to win the gold medal and get freaky in the sand, plays beach volleyball. Because its beach volleyball, the ball and everything else gets sandy, there are attendants around the court bearing towels for the players to wipe off when necessary. This particular young lady has no manners and never once acknowledged the people who gave her the towels. There is a saying that you don't really know what someone is really about until you see how they treat the help. I'm glad she lost.

Oh and since we're talking about sports, If you bother to go to Dodger Stadium for a game and have the best seat, right behind home plate, WATCH THE GAME!!! The beauty of high def is you see everything and if you chat with your pal or catch up on your phone calls while the Dodgers are batting, then DON'T SIT IN THE FRONT ROW!!!! I'm talking to you Vince Vaughn! You just insure that we hardcore fans will never go to your movies and watch you age as fast as David Bowie in The Hunger.

I'm Back!

So I was having some issues with my advertisers that never got resolved so I say, onward.

Is this guy for real? After a lifetime of sitting at the table and eating way more than his share, Mr. T. Boone Pickens has decided that we all need to go on a diet. While I have no problem with the argument that American needs to overcome it's oil lust, is this guy in any position to judge. Solar and wind power must replace oil, but I just don't like the messenger. His basic argument is that our dependence on oil is sending all of our money out of the country. He has no problem with oil lust when it lines his own pocket but giving it to a foreigner is more than he can take. Sounds a bit racist to me. And does he mention global warming and his role in it? That part must have ended up on the cutting room floor of his ubiquitous commercials.

And don't even get me started on his funding of Swift boat liars who torpedoed John Kerry.

It's good to be back.

The Visitor

Summer is the time for bad movies, blockbusters, big explosions, chase scenes, and comic/cartoon characters, when the out of school kids need something to occupy them. But that does not have to be the only choice. I think that if you only see one movie this year, so far, it should be The Visitor.

The Visitor tells the story of a middle aged professor, sleepwalking through his days, whose life becomes intertwined with a young couple trying to build a life together in New York, but living there illegally. Without giving away too much of the plot, The Visitor pulls back the curtain a little to show us the effects of America's immigration policies in the post 9/11 world where secret prisons and shadowy due process have become woven into the fabric of our way of life.

But this does not not do justice to the film, which infuses music with humor and melancholy in ways that all great films should do. It's nice to know that there are filmmakers out there taking on the big issues of the day and talking to us about them like we are adults. Writer/Director Tom McCarthy has done so with great subtlety and nuance that you probably will not get in Ironman and The Incredible Hulk, and actor Richard Jenkins' name will be heard a lot come Oscar time if there is any justice in the world(which there isn't, but I like the expression anyway).

Knuckleheads

Fools and microphones. They just always seem to find each other. As Don Imus once again puts his foot in his mouth, then cries the usual, "just kidding" defense, the cross eyed giant poses the age old question, "Kobe, how my ass taste"? Unbelievable...

George Carlin always knew what to do with a mic in his hands. If he were alive today and heard these two buffoons, he'd die.

Fox guarding the chicken coop

I Love LA

There may be a Starbucks in The Forbidden City. There may be a Disneyland in Paris. Coca Cola may be the largest private sector employer in Africa, but only in Los Angeles do even the mannequins have boob jobs! I spotted this lovely plastic lady on Wilshire Blvd. showing her Laker spirit. What a classic LA moment. I love my city, warts and all.

Father's Day

Today is Father's Day, which means that Dad's everywhere should be free to do whatever it is they want. That means that if they want to play cards all day, so be it. If two desserts is on the menu, then two desserts it is(even if they have to pay for it tomorrow).

My Dad is the best. He made me a man in the way it should be done, by example. I don't think my Dad has ever driven above the speed limit. You cannot underestimate the importance of this, because it shows that there are no loopholes. I think that the greatest disservice a parent can do to a child is to leave an impression that the rules can be bent to fit some short term need. By making "the rules" negotiable, you tell a child that anything goes if you can get away with it, and that goes for their own rules down the line, and will eventually come back to haunt them. Ethics is something that does not get enough respect in our society because religion has made morality more important. In my world, the bumper sticker does not read, "what would Jesus do?" it says, "what would Daddy do?"

Happy Father's Day Daddy!

McCain's new lapdog

I just changed the setting on the blog so that you can email a particular entry by clicking on the envelope icon next to the comment button.

Ode to W

Happy Birthday Mom!!!

Today is my Mom's birthday. I love this picture of her. It was taken at my wedding and I have no idea what she and Rob are laughing about, but it makes me smile. It hangs above my TV, the most hallowed of ground in my home. She gave me my premature grey hair and my nose. She gave me my fire and most of my grit. She gives me the most unconditional love and thinks my comics are funny. She and my Dad give me the reason to keep this blog going. If I was not 3,000 miles away, I would bring her African violets and Bailey's Irish Cream today, but I'm not, so I offer you this tribute instead. Happy Birthday Mom! I love you very much.

Over?

In the neighborhood of funny

Comic strip Part 2

getting closer to funny......maybe.

Comic strip?

My contribution to the realm of questionably funny comics. Click on the image to see full size. This is a work in progress...

Design Within Reach

My wife and I have a running argument about Design Within Reach. Design Within Reach is a furniture store that features stylish modern furniture. We are both fans of this particular style and always look through the new catalogue when it comes in the mail. The argument pretty much always goes the same way, I start ranting and raving about the "within reach" part of the name. $1,900 chairs and $18,000 couches are hardly "within reach" for most people. Her argument, which sounds remarkably like their company line, is that pieces from the great designers of our times are virtually inaccessible for most people because one would have to know someone to even be able to get an appointment with them. Even if this is true, it begs the question, what does "within reach" really mean. I think that you have to be rich no matter what to own the majority of the stuff they sell. Two designers featured in the catalogue, Charles/Ray Eames and Isamu Noguchi did in fact make affordable furniture for the masses when they were alive. I don't know, it just seems ridiculous to sell a chair that costs a third of the average person's yearly salary and that is hardly "within reach"

Sunday Funnies

Are the sunday comics supposed to be funny? For the life of me, I don't see much humor. Granted, my sense of humor may not be the best, but half of the comic strips don't seem to even have a punchline. You know it's a problem when Doonesbury makes the most sense in all of the sunday funnies. Perhaps it's generational but I think there has to be more to it than that. This stuff isn't even corny.

It's too bad Boondocks is gone. That, I got. And I do like La Cucaracha by Lalo Alcaraz.