A modest proposal

I am so tired of people honking their car horns. It is the quintessential display of hostile impatience. I know you can't take away people's horns, since they do serve a purpose, like if you're coming around a blind turn in the mountains or something. I suggest a compromise. All new cars should come with two horns, the standard obnoxious horn for emergencies, and a second, more pleasant horn. We'll call it a courtesy horn. It could sound like those old fashioned "model t" oogah horns, which would make me smile if someone tooted that behind me if I don't go the split second after the light turns green. Maybe they can make a horn that is the first two notes of "So what" by Miles Davis. Even a clown horns would beat the current blare. And how about a horn that sounded like those metal bells they used to put on bicycles or even one that sounds like the bellhop bell at the desk in hotels. Think of the decline in road rage.

Ok Toyota, get on that.

I decided to start posting some of my paintings periodically. These are part of a series of acrylics inspired by song lyrics. More to follow...



When most people think of Prince, I bet the first thing that comes to mind is those pants with the butt cut out.
Or maybe they don’t.
What I wish they thought was of one of the most astute social commentators of my generation or any one else’s. Sign o the Times is such a sad song, documenting the ravages of AIDS, gang violence, and God’s wrath, but at the end of the day it’s a song of hope, with love saving the day.
And baby shoes are just cool. I don’t know why, but baby shoes are definitely cool.

Bad Bruin Karma

The victory over Stanford last night was fantastic. UCLA has a whole lot of heart. That was better than the Michigan State comeback. I had one problem when it was over though. As the teams headed for respective locker rooms, the UCLA announcer felt the need to state what everyone already knew, that UCLA had clinched the Pac-10 title, which of course brought a roar from the home crowd. I don't know, I felt a little bad for Stanford having to hear that as they left the court. It just seemed like rubbing it in to a team that did not deserve it. Not only is Stanford a very good team, they win the right way, with teamwork and sportsmanship. I think of Robin Lopez helping Russell Westbrook up after a hard foul as a good example of who they are. There are plenty of class challenged types in the Pac-10 like Mr. "please get this guy a tailor" coach across town or "pelt 'em in the face" Morris at Washington, who might justifiably get some Bruin blood boiling, but not The Cardinal. I like to think that we as Bruins are above that. We don't need to show people up. Who are we? Florida? I'm glad John Wooden was not there to hear it. And why give extra motivation to a team you might meet again twice this year. SO NOT COOL!

Vogue is for illiterates

As I look at the three foot stack of magazines staring back at me in the reading room(you know, where I rest on the porcelain throne at 8:15am most days) I spy a headline of the wife's latest issue of Vogue that says "4 day drug detox". Though I have little interest in drug rehab, detox diets intrigue me so I decide to crack open the Yellow Pages sized magazine to check it out. That magazine is made for people who do not read! Its like when you're in a mall and all you want to do is get your underwear and some t-shirts at the gap and leave, but the up escalator and down escalator are on opposite ends of the mall so you have to walk past every shop. Well, finding a table of contents in Vogue is like finding a down escalator, you are going to put in some work to find it. The table of contents starts on around page 160 although who can tell for sure, since they arbitrarily decide when to put page numbers in there, and with all the "ads" between the ads, page numbering gets a little hinky. I never did find the article on detox. Such is life...

Club Monaco Sucks

So I'm in this store on the 3rd street promenade called Club Monaco last week. I had picked out this dress for my wife for her birthday and I'm waiting in line. It's about 7 pm the day before Valentine's Day so I know its going to take some time to get through the line. There are two people working registers, a young man and a not as young woman who had that "I'm in charge" vibe, the way she barked orders at the man. I hate seeing that. Then, a beautiful girl (17 years old at most) walked behind the counter and tells the manager that it's 7 so she's off the clock. The barker then tells her to open her purse, which the young girl dutifully does. After giving the bag a thorough looking over, she tells her she can go. Did I mention this is in a clothing store in Santa Monica. It felt more like county jail. I understand that employees steal. I get that young employees making minimum wage may steal a lot. But this should not happen in front of customers. I wonder how this girl gets treated when there is no one around to see. Maybe if the young girl was not Black, I would have felt less offended, but I doubt it. Anyway, the second this little exchange ended, I put the dress back on the rack and walked out of the store. Club Monaco will never get my money thanks to one horrible manager.

My wife liked the outfit I got instead at Anthropologie